Post 7…January 2023…Have you been a stalking victim

Saturday, January 7, 2023

Definition of stalking:  It is a pattern of behavior that may cause fear or concern for the person who is the focus of this person’s behavior

Statistics have changed over the years so this might not be the latest information but should be pretty close. 

One out of every 12 women has been stalked at some time in their life, and men get stalked as well.  It is unwanted contact between two people that directly or indirectly communicates a threat or places a victim in fear:

Following someone around, showing up at places you shouldn’t be at

Going to someone’s work at watching them, even making unwanted contact or communication

Making harassing phone calls

Leaving messages or objects for the person

Vandalizing a person’s property

Breaking into someone’s home

Talking to others close to them about them


If you are a victim of abuse or violence at the hands of someone you know or love or you are recovering from an assault by a stranger…you are not alone. 

Stalking can be very traumatic and cause emotional stress, fear, nightmares, feeling out of control of your own life, trouble sleeping, always looking around to make sure you are in a safe environment and so on.  You can feel vulnerable or depressed.  Stalking can also cause financial stress because the victim is even afraid to go to work.  These things happen to both men and women, boys, and girls.

If you know or believe that you are being stalked…or feel in immediate danger, find a safe place to go like a good friend…like the police station, domestic violence shelter, or get into a public area.  If you can’t get out of danger…call the police immediately!!!!!!!!

We all know that they tell us to get a restraining order.  Sounds good and yes, you should get one, but what if you don’t know who they are, where they live etc.  It sounds good that they can’t get close to you anymore, but we also know that a stalker or abusive person seldom honors the restraining order.  Talk to a victim advocate or attorney in your area (yes, most attorneys cost, but some do pro bono work).  See how there can be an arrest of this person if the stalker violates the order.  How many times do courts tell people they can’t do something “until”.  I hate that until.  Until what?  Until someone harms someone else.  There has to be a better way to stop these crazy people from stalking someone.

Always file a complaint with the police….always!

Keep a diary of sorts of every incident that happens with date, time, circumstances, where you were, what you were doing, who was around and so on.  Keep that safe! 

Keep any phone videos, answering making, or voice machine….do not delete them.  Keep a copy of any damage someone does to your property as well.  Keep any correspondence. 

Tell people (family, friends, and work) what is happening and ask them to also keep an eye out for you and your safety. 

Lock your doors and windows…and make sure

Any more you can have cameras inside and outside of where you live, and also on your vehicle. 

Tell your neighbors that you feel you are being stalked and would they keep an eye open to anyone who looks suspicious

If you are in school…notify the school as well that you feel like this.  It could be nothing, or it could be everything. 

It is said that approximately 15% of women and 7 % of men have been stalked at some point.

With all of the social media and apps out there young people who are on them give out way to much information that people can find and stalk them.  Beware of whom you talk to, for people are seldom who they claim to be. Perverts, rapists, and traffickers can use social media to find victims. Beware!  We know kids don’t like their own parents to know whom they talk to etc., but your parents love you and want to keep you safe.  Trust them!  Trust their instincts.

As for young people being stalked 50% of them were stalked before the age of 25 and many, many nowadays as kids and teenagers…beware! 

For those that have been stalked the percentage of knowing someone was stalking them is probably closer to 80% knew or know someone is watching them.  A lot of times the person has met the perpetrator prior…like through an acquaintance or family member.  Strangers are much less perpetrators of stalking like at about 25%…but it happens so beware!

Another kind of stalker is the one that you have known very well…like an ex, someone you dated or rejected dating.  Sometimes the one being stalked said something not meaning it bad, but the person took it as such.  When a stalker of this type is out there, they usually get jealous that you are seeing other people and they don’t like that.  Again, Beware!  And, know this even a relative can be a stalker.  Sometimes when this happens they get you to go places you should not be, and they use things you said or do against you that were told to them in confidence. 

Most female stalking victims were stalked by a male, and like only 50 % of men were stalked by women.  Sometimes both female and male victims are stalked by the ex-person in the life whom they are seeing now.  People don’t like to lose even if they know the relationship was wrong and was not going anywhere. 

We need laws that can stop this from happening, but right now…we must do whatever we can to protect ourselves and our loved ones.  Please let people know what is going on, and when you go out go with someone and let others know where you will be, with whom, how you are getting there, and when you will be home.  Let someone know you got home safely as well. 

Stalking is dangerous for all concerned.  You must stay alert to your surroundings.  Really, pay attention to your surroundings.  Who belongs there and who doesn’t?  Watch when you get in your car, where you park, and park near a light and not a dark place.  For many, they will look under their car to make sure no one is under or on the other side of the car when they go to open the door. 

We have all watched crime shows and we don’t want any of us to be a statistic for crime.  So, please don’t keep the stalking feeling to yourself. 

Read more on this subject because the very life you protect is yours and those you care about. 

Now, may God protect you, show you insight into what is going on in your life, and may He give you peace and strength to endure. 

God bless you